A Secret Love
by Inks Inc
Summary: Decisions maketh the man. But sometimes, decisions... well, they can break the man, too.


Andrea looked up sharply as Mr Grey stormed past her desk with a face like thunder. Her sharp eyes caught the small brown paper bag he was carrying just before the door to his office was slammed loudly shut. She blinked in surprise. There was no denying that her mercurial boss had his flaws, but tantrum throwing wasn't one of them. He didn't slam doors, not ever. Scanning his calendar that she already knew by heart, Andrea's brows knitted together in bewilderment. There was nothing or no one on the schedule that would or should have elicited such a response in the usually stoic Mr Grey. Which could only leave one possible explanation.

It was something personal.

Turning back to her computer with a sigh, Andrea resolved to mind her own business. There was no way in hell she was going to go into the lion's den and attempt to calm a raging beast. She had learnt the hard way once before that the wall between Christian Grey's personal and professional life put the Berlin Wall to shame in its construction. It was twenty minutes later when the door opened once more, but much more softly this time. Glancing discreetly up, Andrea felt her jaw hit the Earth's core.

Red-rimmed eyes, puffy cheeks and an aroma of such sadness it seemed to waft from him to her.

Crying.

Christian Grey... had been _crying._

"Jesus H Christ," she whispered to herself as he strode like a bat out of hell down the corridor and through the glass double doors. She sat frozen in her seat. For the first time in her adult life, she hadn't a bulls notion as to what to do. It was obvious that whatever was going on, Mr Grey didn't want to share. Not that he ever did. Sitting back in her chair, Andrea swallowed hard and made her decision.

She would pretend like nothing was happening.

That's what Mr Grey would want.

Down the hall and far from prying eyes, Christian barreled into a disused conference room that held no painful memories and shut the door tightly behind him. Here, there were no ringing phones and no glass paneled walls. His heart thudded with irregular beats as a private grief consumed him. He led a lonely life. No friends, certainly no girlfriend or anything of the kind. All he had was his work and... him. He had kept him a secret all these years. Not even his family knew about him, it'd give them the wrong idea.

Deep in the confines of Escala, it was just him and his man.

Raw anguish gurgled in his throat and tears threatened once more. He hadn't cried before this day since his seventh birthday and the sensation was foreign as fuck to him. Clutching his throat, he leaned against a cold wall in the stale darkness with nothing but pain for company. His companionship, his unassuming love. It was stripped from him now and he knew he would never find anything of its kind, ever again.

Alone. He was completely alone.

There would be no more warm greetings when he got home. There would be no more silent understanding. There would be no more sense of belonging. It was gone now and he was the one who had ended it. He had to. He had no choice. Before he had come into Christian's life, the mogul knew nothing about love. Didn't know he was even capable of it, let alone fit to embrace it. But that all changed that day so many years ago. A scalding tear dripped with a splash onto the collar of his stiff white shirt and a memory was triggered from the deepest depths of his mind.

The day he had come home to find a ruined five hundred dollar shirt and a chagrined face.

How he had laughed that day. Uproarious laugher that set his soul on fire. The memory fought like hell against the riptide of loss lapping against him and his tear stained lips twitched upwards in a shadow of a smile. They had good times and great years. Ups and downs for sure, but all set to the soundtrack of an unshakable bond. The trust they shared was unparalleled. That had been reinforced like a concrete foundation today. The calm belief in his eyes at the end that he was still looking out for him... that look was something Christian would never, ever forget. And even as kind, loving eyes closed for the last time... it was as if he was telling him that they'd see each other again. That he, Charlie, would never leave him forever.

Such is the love between one man and his dog.

...

A/N: I lost my dog and best friend of many, many years yesterday and this is my way of working through it. We were the best of friends and he lived a cracking life so I'm looking at the bright side and trying to get Christian to do the same!


End file.
